Monday, May 31, 2010

Day 151- Memory in blank verse

Dear Mr. President,

I walked to work today in the pouring rain. My blood still boiling from last night, drums in my ears asking me to keep my compassion, to keep my cool, I walked and sulked and snapped at anything I could think of. I know, today is a day for remembering. Today is a day to remember the girls and boys we put in men's uniforms and gave weapons and made murderers (and murdered.) To remember the suits who sent them to their deaths and destinies. To remember the placid, peaceful suburbs and 3-day only sales we sent them to protect.

Sometimes I feel like I'm watching a microcosm of US history on fast-forward in Palestine. I fear that Palestinians face the same fate as the Native Americans; refugee camps like reservations, ostensible autonomy that creates isolation, not independence, dying traditions and tongues, hunted, then marginalized, disenfranchised, disarmed, disbanded, disappeared. When we remember the soldiers who have died for this country, do we also honor the dead who died for us to take it from them? Where is their bank holiday, their 3-day only sale? I'm so confused today, tangled up in the inevitable contradiction of being an American; of being born with blood on my hands, bearing the burden of an original sin, not against God but against my fellow man. I want to sort out these feelings; to tease out these threads into distinct narratives, of America, of Palestine, of wars and war crimes, to place it all on a timeline that makes sense.

Nothing makes sense today. Grief is giving way to disorientation and disbelief. Some lady was yelling at me about swiping her gift card too many times, because I might scratch it, and people are being taken off of a humanitarian ship in Haifa, to be taken to a room in the Tel Aviv airport, or to a prison cell, a hospital room, or a morgue. I'm just not sure I understand how these realities overlap. I've stepped, too far, off of some undersea shelf, and now I can only tread water. I can't tell if the White House thinks this is bad because it looks bad for Israel, or if, underneath the suits that control the truth, there are fathers who would not see their daughters suffer as daughters of fathers across Gaza are suffering. If you believe your own spin, or if you're saying it in the hopes of making the truth less devastating. Those boys in men's uniforms dropping down zip lines from choppers onto boats were acting in self defense. They were terrified of a truth so horrible it cannot be erased by bulletts. The truth that makes it so much harder to put on the uniform and pick up the gun. It was self defense, and if you say it enough times, it might be true.

In Washington, an unknown tomb is honored. The Schrödinger's cat of Identity. He could be white or black or Native or فلسطيني. Unknown could be any of us, bones bleached anciently to only human. The shifting, changing, contradictory American; he no longer needs to know how to live, it has been answered for him. He might have died for freedom, or security, or national unity; fighting the British, the Union, the Confederates or the Nazis. He might have fallen on a Pacific Island, or a Vietnamese jungle, or an Iraqi city. He might have been young, he might have been frightened, he might have been ready. He knows how to be an American, if he is all of these things.

Walking home, the rain had stopped. A day spent laboring under the layers of glass and steel and light that make up this city had made me tired, but hadn't made sense out of anything. I don't know what I remember and what I've just been told. I was told to remember those who died to make America safe for me. To teach me how to be an American on days like these. Overwhelmed, other people's memories wash over me; of Crow and of Blackfoot and of Cherokee, of Gettysburg and Bull's run and Blakely; of Pearl Harbor, and Dresden and Nagasaki; of Kabul and Baghdad and Karachi. (Of the dead, from a ship, in the darkness between Gaza and Turkey.) Lies are pouring in from men in suits on TV, while witnesses are being processed and discredited, until no one knows what they saw or who shot first. I still know what I believe. The drums haven't stopped. Compassion. Compassion. Compassion. I can't let it be taken from me.

To the dead, today, I remember you. I am humbled by your lives and how you lost them, for me. I still don't know how to be an American the way I am intended to, especially on days like these.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Day 150- I don't know their names

Dear Mr. President,

2 more names can be added to the ranks of those who have died attempting to stand up to Israeli injustice against the Palestinians. I don't know their names, yet. Dozens are injured, more deaths may be occurring now, as the attack against ships loaded with humanitarian aid continues. I'm not angry, yet. I can feel it, see the shadow as it descends upon me, as I choke back the tears of frustration that precede it. I want to see you respond, Mr. President, I want you to go on TV and tell me why these people are dead and why we are continuing to fund the military that killed them. I want you to explain to me, in your rational way, why this is in our national interest. Tell me why it is acceptable behavior on the part of our ally to use lethal force against a humanitarian ship. This is not about demonizing Israel; I would question our support of any nation that conducted itself in this manner, that used overwhelming and violent force against peaceful dissent.

How is this going to end, Mr. President? How many more innocent will die? How many more? What do you think is going do for our long-term security? Or Israel's? In the time it has taken me to write the above paragraph, the death toll has been estimated to be 10 people. These were unarmed, peaceful activists seeking to bring medical and educational and construction supplies. Please, Mr. President, explain why the education, health and safety of Gazans is so dangerous that it must be prevented with lethal force? I do not want to be a part of this occupation, any longer. I do not want to pay for the weapons being used to murder humanitarian workers. I do not want this to be conducted in my name. If America's policies in this area cannot be changed, I, and the millions of others outraged by this, deserve an explanation.

The death toll is now being reported at 16. How many more will be dead by the time you receive this letter, I cannot say. Will you know their names, Mr. President?

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Day 149- No drama

Dear Mr. President,

"President Spock," "No Drama Obama," the list of ways the media has found to call you calm, as either an insult or a compliment, seems to get more creative all the timeMaureen Dowd writes today about the paternal aspect of the presidency, something she feels you are failing at. A President, apparently, must demonstrate the emotional state of the nation to show that he understands how people feel. I don't often find myself in such strong disagreement with Ms. Dowd. I don't need you to show me your emotional response to the oil spill in order to feel better about my own; I believe that you have emotions, just like me, and that, just like me, you decide who sees how you feel and who sees how you think. I don't believe that the citizens of this country are entitled to see every aspect of your personality; we ought to hold you accountable for how well you do your job, not how well you demonstrate that you feel the "right" way about every issue. I don't need to see you react the same way I do.

I think this urge we have, to feel that we know our leaders on a personal level, manifested in votes based on who we'd rather have a beer with, or in a need to see ourselves and our lifestyles reflected in those of our elected officials, is not always the surest compass to find the best qualified leaders. I'm an emotional person. I feel things violently, obsessively, consumingly. I do not appreciate this about myself, and think that, especially in matters of leadership and crisis management, it can be considered more a weakness than a strength. I look for a leader who can calmly, thoughtfully, rationally make decisions based on information and guided by a sense of what the best choices will be. I didn't vote for you because I thought you'd cry at things that make me cry or scream at things that make me want to scream; I voted for you because I hoped that you would, in the face of these things, have more productive solutions than my tears.

This is not to imply, as Ms. Dowd does, that you lack emotional depth. I think that your emotional reactions are kept private, as most of us prefer ours to be. I am often moved by displays of emotion by politicians; that does not mean I have to see such displays to know they exist. Asking for such demonstrations from our elected officials is only asking to be lied to. Our need to feel better, to be comforted by the parroting of our responses by others, does not help us overcome the challenges of our times. As much as I might like to know you as a person, to feel that we are friends and that you are just like me, it would do me no practical good. I don't believe that any one who hears the news from the gulf, or who has seen the terrible images, especially some one who must take responsibility for fixing it, can be unaffected. But your feelings are your own, Mr. President, and, while I clearly do not speak for Ms. Dowd and may not speak for the majority of American voters, I, personally, do not need you to share them in order to satisfy my own desire to see my own personality reflected in my President's.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Friday, May 28, 2010

Day 148- 9 Ships

Dear Mr. President,

9 ships are on their way from international waters to the Gaza shore. Israel has vowed to turn them back or reroute them, and is already constructing a makeshift camp for detaining those onboard. These ships are being called, by Israeli officials, absolute provocation. One even commented on the mission to break the blockade, as a violation of international law. I found this to be especially interesting phrasing for a country so often acting as though it is unaware of, or even above, international law. Might now be the time to discuss illegal settlement expansion, or collective punishment, or the 1977 protocols of the Geneva convention, or, perhaps, Nuclear nonproliferation? While I'm glad to know that the Israeli government has enough of a passing familiarity with international law to acknowledge its existence, I think it would have more credibility citing these laws if it even pretended to obey them in times of war or in "peacetime" occupation of Palestine. But, I suppose the dire threat posed by 9 boats full of construction, education and medical equipment must be weighed against the risk of looking a touch hypocritical, and if there is one thing the Israeli government has never shown itself to be averse to, it's hypocrisy.

Are humanitarian efforts to supply the people of Gaza a threat to anything other than Israel's moral authority? What strikes me the most about this is that the Israeli government has decided to handle it by declaring that there is no humanitarian crisis in Gaza. The EU disagrees. The UN disagrees. Human Rights Watch disagrees. Israeli human rights group B'Tselem disagrees. Certainly there are many sides to every story, but there is also reality, there are also facts. We cannot escape or deny or doublespeak them into submission. There is a humanitarian crisis in Gaza. There will be no peace, no progress, unless this is acknowledged as reality. The actions of this convoy may be provocative; they are also compassionate, courageous and the only course left to peacefully redress the atrocious abuses of human rights against the people of Gaza by the Israeli military.

I have little doubt that the White House lacks the political will (and not to mention courage) to address this situation with more than a bland equivocation calling for restraint from all sides. I would hope that you, my president, could see the obvious absurdity of these peaceful activists on a humanitarian mission being treated as though they were a military threat, and would denounce both the siege that has prompted their mission and any aggression directed toward them in response. 9 ships will not carry enough supplies to help the people of Gaza rebuild; they will not have enough educational materials for all the children of Gaza who long to go to well-equipped schools; they will not stabilize the Gazan economy, or provide shelter for all who seek it. 9 ships will not be enough, but they are a start. We should be sending ships, Mr. President, we should be sending funds and supplies and personell and political support. We should be on the side of ending the suffering, defending the weak, and promoting the freedom and dignity of all. If we cannot do this, if we lack the political will to do the right thing ourselves, we at least ought to bring the weight of our influence with Israel to protect those brave enough to do it for us. Please, Mr. President, ask Israel not to arrest these activists, to allow these 9 ships to dock in Gaza, and to let what little help they bring to come ashore.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Day 147

Dear Mr. President,

I'm not sure what you could have done to please the people who are still complaining about your lack of involvement in the oil spill. Maybe you could have put on scuba gear and patched the leak manually? Anyway, I think that the horror of the situation is not that more could have been done, but that no one knows, exactly, what to do now.

My own world has been very small these last few days. My brother-in-law's father passed away, and so my sister has left her 2-year old son with his aunts and grandmother these last few days. Right now he's not too pleased to be with his aunty and not his mom, but we watched Star Wars together, so I think, on the whole, he's going to be OK with it. I love spending time with my nephew, but I couldn't take this on as a full-time job. This is why I'm so constantly amazed at his Dad, who is not his biological father, but who still has committed himself to raising my nephew as his own. I didn't know his father, who just passed away, but he must have been a good dad himself, to raise such a remarkable son. The kinds of patience and selflessness required to parent a young child are not often seen in my age group, (I certainly don't possess them,) and so I'm always surprised to encounter these qualities in people my own age.

Looking at the world from the perspective of my nephew, who won't even be old enough to vote until 2026, I realize how angry I'd be, if I were him. The world we're leaving his generation is in pretty bad shape, and, as appalling as our mistakes and failures may have been, sometimes its the answers we don't even know we need to look for that scare me the most. One of our uncles in Florida called last week to apologize to my aunt for not taking her diving in the Florida keys last time she visited. He knows now, because of the spill, it's unlikely that they'll be able to do so again in their lifetimes. I've never been to the Florida keys at all, nor have I been to Louisiana, but at least I got a chance to swim in the Gulf of Mexico once, several years ago. I still hold out hope that Asher will have that chance, too.

Anyway, Mr. President, I share your frustration at the lack of progress, and I believe that finding a solution is, for now, more important than finding out who is to blame. I appreciate your continued emphasis on the role BP has in this, as well as you ability to take responsibility for the mistakes of your own administration, and I hope that we take all necessary steps to ensure that this never happens again. My heart is heavy for the people who live in the region, and also for children like my nephew, who will grow up never knowing how it was before this disaster.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Day 146-We gave peace a chance, and this is what we got

Dear Mr. President,

In 2003 my family went to New York City for the first time. I wanted to attend NYU, and so I visited the campus. We saw a broadway show. We went shopping. Because our trip fell just before the 2nd anniversary of 9/11, we went to ground zero. I remember the silence started several blocks away. On the wall near the site of the attack, people had written messages; one message stuck with me. "We gave peace a chance," it said, "and this is what we got." At the time, a senor in a high school that didn't teach world history much past WWII, I couldn't explain, exactly, why this bothered me. Overcome by the despair in these scrawled letters, I snapped a photograph, and did not give it much further thought. What struck me, next, were the rows and rows of vendors selling Ground Zero merchandise, some blaring that awful Enya remix from stereo systems, tugging at the heat and purse strings of tourists. It did not feel like a memorial site, so much as an open wound, still raw and oozing, still ambivalent as to what kind of scar it would become.

Now, years later, the debate over the sacred nature of this place has taken an ugly turn. An Islamic community center, proposed too close to the site, for some, has sparked objections based solely in hatred and ignorance. I don't know what Ground Zero is; shrine or grave or tourist trap, it is only one thing that every one can agree upon, and that is American. Our values have a place here, as anywhere, and those values would not allow us to keep Muslims out because of their religion. Mr. President, I think you should speak out about this. I think you should show that Americans stand with our Muslim communities, that we do not think there are any places in this country where one particular religion is not welcome. Whether or not we had before 9/11, we cannot, now, make the mistake of dividing our country along religious lines. American Muslims are just as American and American Christians, or Americans of any religion. Welcoming them into communities, encouraging them to participate in the stewardship of their communities, and even to bear witness to the healing of the great trauma that they, as Americans and as New Yorkers, undoubtedly shared, will only help us move forward a stronger nation.

Were we, in fact, punished for giving peace a chance? I'm not going to comment on what actions or inactions may have contributed to 9/11. In my opinion, whatever legitimate grievances the attackers may have had with our country became irrelevant the moment the hijacked those planes. Whatever reasonable points of criticism they might have made were silenced forever in the roar of engines and impacts and fire. I do think that if we allow these acts to change us into something unrecognizable, to a place where some religions are simply not accepted, than we surrender far more than they ever could have taken from us by force.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Day 145- Tin-foil hats and Scud missiles

Dear Mr. President,

Is something happening to Lebanon soon? I don't mean to sound like some crazy, tin-foil-hat wearing conspiracy theorist, but I couldn't help but notice you and Vice-President Biden have reached out to Prime Minister Hariri twice in as many days. This seemed odd, in and of its self, but then I read about the missile drills Israel is staging this week, which are being taken by the Lebanese government as preparation for war. Hizbollah's ties to Iran might also indicate that something is possibly about to happen to Iran, instead. Either way, I hope I'm just being paranoid. If I'm not, just in case it doesn't go without saying, I'm hoping that you exhaust all of our options to help avoid another conflict that will only cause the innocent to suffer.

When I worked at Borders in downtown Washington, I once rang up a woman for all of our remaining copies of Killing Mr. Lebanon, a book about the assassination of Rafik Hariri. Her distress was evident, and so I asked her about Mr. Hariri, who, she said, had been her boss. She tearfully told me about working in his government, how much she'd admired him, and how much she missed him still. It was moving to see her affection for this man, both on a personal and on a political level. Her grief came, in part, at the immense loss her country had suffered. This was not long after the 2006 war that destroyed so many lives and so much of her country. Maybe it's easy to say this, when the tragic history of this place is given a face in my memory, but I think Lebanon has been through enough. We (and, more importantly, our allies,) could maybe let Beirut stand for more than 4 years before trying to knock it all down, again.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Monday, May 24, 2010

Day 144- Green, Pink and (Red)

Dear Mr. President,

Twice in the last two days I've encountered the term "greenwashing," a concept with which I was previously unfamiliar. Greenwashing, the practice of a company promoting false or exaggerated environmental claims in order to increase profits, can also be applied to other causes exploited for corporate game; KFC has recently been accused of pinkwashing, while (Red)washing charges have been leveled at Gap and Apple. My own employer is often accused of such practices, which is the context in which I first learned this term.

I'm struggling with this. I don't like the idea of exploiting consumer idealism for profit; my last employer did this on a regular basis, on a much smaller scale. We'd often be told to organize book drives for local charities, in order to increase the number of books (or toys) our customers purchased. However, we would not accept donations that customers brought in or purchased elsewhere. Every time I'd head complaints about this, however, I'd have to ask, do the children receiving these donations care if the company sending them had ulterior motives? Also, a struggling company is always going to try to convince customers to spend more; if they can't appeal to anything but a customer's charitable instincts, doesn't that do more good than finding a way to convince them to spend more on themselves?

When it comes to campaigns like product (Red), detractors claim that marketing the trendiness or sex appeal of social causes does more to increase the profits for the corporations, than it does for the charities they partner with. This criticism seems foolish; Bono's entire pitch for corporations participating in (Red) is based on the idea that participating in the fight against AIDS can help businesses. If these companies aren't donating enough of their profits for the satisfaction of some critics, boycotting these products isn't likely to encourage them to donate more. I think that any money generated by such campaigns is better than no money at all; it's impossible to gauge how much awareness this creates, as well. Will a consumer who has spent a little more for a product that donates to a social cause feel that they've done enough, and stop donating, or feel good, and donate more in order to continue feeling good? What is the harm in encouraging our consumption to be directed in ways that are, even marginally, mitigating to the damage our way of life does to the earth and the developing world?

Of course, there are other examples of harmful practices that are cloaked in claims of corporate responsibility. KFC's partnership to help breast cancer research, for example, encourages behavior that probably leads to breast cancer, (and is, inarguably, unhealthy.) BP's "Beyond Petroleum" ad campaign was deceitful, at best, even before the oil spill. And corporations aren't the only ones guilty of this; Israel's 60-year anniversary spawned an ad campaign to encourage tourism with the unconscionably insensitive slogan "No one belongs here more than you." When advertising is so disingenuous that it actively encourages purchases or behavior that is outright harmful to the buyer or to others, especially when it is done in the name of charity, conservation or any good cause, I think it crosses the line.

What would you say, Mr. President? Would you rather Americans bought fair-trade, shade-grown coffee from Starbucks and product (red) shirts from Gap, or that we saved our money, purchased less, and donated to these causes directly? Do we have to bring down corporations for their harmful practices, or pressure them, through our spending, to change their ways? Is a good deed less "good" if it is done for selfish reasons?

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey


Sunday, May 23, 2010

Day 143- Seattle is a kind and loving city brownies

Dear Mr. President,

Tonight a few friends hosted a pot-luck dinner to feature local foods. We bought bread from local bakeries, vegetables and fruit from local farmers, chocolate and beer from local companies. The results were beautiful, and delicious.

I brought zucchini-peppermint-fudge brownies. I've made them before, but tonight they came out better than ever, rich and dark and minty. They're even vegan.


Eating locally in Seattle is probably easier than in other parts of the country. We have plenty of farmer's markets and a tremendous amount of community support that make locally-based choices convenient and even trendy. It's sometimes frustrating when our long rainy season makes it hard to find the produce that, imported, is available-year round. I've just gotten used to waiting all year for decent tomatoes, though, because the first time I had a local heirloom, I was pretty much ruined for the tasteless, hyper-red imitations still stocked in December.

Maybe it's pretentious, but eating food that hasn't been bred for durability during shipping, or disguised by shelf-life-lengthening additives, just tastes better. It gives me a greater appreciation for the people who supply our food and for the way our policies affect them, and also a greater concern for those who live in communities without access to local produce. I hope that this trend is more than just the whim of hipster culture and an indication of a growing commitment to local food. I think the First Family has done an impressive job of encouraging this. The First Lady's anti-obesity campaign has certainly made the connection between fresh, locally-grown food and the health of the community; I hope that tonight's dinner would make her proud.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Seattle is a kind and loving city brownies

Adapted from The Veganomicon's Fudgy Wudgy blueberry brownies, (Named the day a stranger gave me grocery money after my wallet was stolen.)

Ingredients:

2 med Zucchini, finely shredded
1 cup semisweet chocolate chips or chopped chocolate bar
1/4 cup almond milk
3/4 cup raw sugar
1 cup canola oil
2 tsp peppermint extract
1 1/2 cups flour
1/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1/4 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp salt
1-2 Theo dark-chocolate and mint bars, chopped into small pieces.

Preheat oven to 325 and lightly oil a glass, 9 x 13 baking pan.

Melt chocolate chips or chopped bar over a double broiler, set aside. Combine shredded zucchini, sugar, almond milk, oil, and extracts, mix until smooth. In a separate bowl, sift together flour, cocoa powder, salt, baking soda, baking powder, and slowly combine with liquid mixture. fold in melted chocolate and chopped mint-chocolate bars. Spread into pan, and bake 40 minutes.



Saturday, May 22, 2010

Day 142- Moonshine

Dear Mr. President,

The oil spill keeps coming up in odd conversations today. A coworker asked me if I'd written to you about it, after she'd learnt the extent of the damage. A customer, before driving off with his latte, asked if we'd heard about the 10-mile underwater plumes. My Aunt, visiting from California, brought up the ominous feelings she's been having about how much worse it could get. It's been on my mind all day, so perhaps it's understandable that when I saw the headline for Nicholas Kristof's op-ed, "Moonshine or the kids?" I thought it was a reference to the oil spill. The op-ed is actually about misplaced priorities amongst the poorest families in Africa who struggle with substance abuse problems. But it might as well be about the boomer generation.

It's not that I think they're bad parents. I think, for the most part, parents want to do the right thing for their children, to act in their best interest. But, be it cheap oil or lower taxes or wracking up credit card debit instead of saving for college, the generation that has steered our nation to its current state has been quick to trade long-term interest for immediate gratification. To keep drinking the moonshine.

The conversation with my coworker quickly devolved into a litany of things that are wrong with the world, things that scare us, if we think about them too much. The world is so messed up, I told her, and I just don't know how to fix it. Getting angry at those that brought us here, the generation that came before, won't help me fix it. I know this. I think you're a long-term thinker, Mr. President, and what many would call inaction is in fact a strategy that considers the next five generations and not just the next five years. I hope that this perception is an accurate one; if we do not change the way we think, start seeing our children's legacy as more valuable than our next fix, they will never forgive us.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Friday, May 21, 2010

Day 141- War isn't making me poor

Dear Mr. President,

Representative Alan Grayson is proposing The War Is Making You Poor Act, which would redirect funding from Afghanistan and Iraq to relieve the income tax burden on incomes up to $35,000. I didn't end up paying taxes this year. War isn't making me poor, Mr. President. War is making me ashamed of my country. War is making me less free, less educated and less safe. War is making me afraid. These things are OK, though, because war is making other people much worse, it is making them sick and homeless and crazy and dead. War is making is making people so many things that are even worse than poor. I'm with Mr. Grayson, in that I think our national priorities are defined by our spending and that our spending indicates we value death, destruction and oppression. I think defunding these disasters is a great idea, but, instead of tax cuts, let's spend this money improving education, improving care and benefits for our veterans, strengthening domestic law enforcement and investing in clean energy. You see, taxes aren't making me poor, either.

I think Grayson's bill, even if I think the money could be better spent elsewhere, is something that deserves debate and serious attention in the House; sadly, it is unlikely to be treated as anything more than a stunt. The inertia of our foreign policy, especially as it is inherited by one party from its ideological opponents, makes established conflicts seem inevitable. We're there, so now we have to think in small, strategic steps. We have to finish what we came to do, to sew up the wounds left by our clumsy surgery and hope we're able to revive the patient without too much brain damage. But I don't think this is an apt metaphor. I don't believe the havoc we've brought to these countries is going to help them, or keep us safer. I don't think that you believe this either. You were right to oppose the war in 2003 and you have promised us a foreign policy that represents our values. So, instead of spending another year tied to these wars, strangling our national budget and staining our reputation darker each day, let's get out, right now. The world does not always have to change so slowly.

Mr. President, I support this bill. In my case, that requires nothing extraordinary. For you, even to ask that it be seriously debated would require the kind of courage politicians usually can't seem to locate. I understand this, but I hope you find it anyway.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Day 140- Blame

Dear Mr. President,

The images coming out of Louisiana's wetlands are frightening. I can't imagine the environmental and economic repercussions that this disaster will have, long-term. BP must be held accountable, and it is good that you're demanding they pay for the mess they created. But you're forgetting to address the group of people who deserve most of the blame. The ones who, in their constant demand for more and cheaper oil, are truly the cause of this oil spill. The American people.

It's not popular to blame us for anything. It's easy to target those in power or those who make their money from this industry. But it's our fault. We use too much oil; we use it recklessly, we use it wastefully and we use it without any consideration for the consequences. Speaking hard truths to the people who put you in office is sort of your job, Mr. President, and the truth is that we're the ones to blame. We ought to pay, not for the clean-up, which should be the responsibility of the private companies who caused it, but for ensuring that something like this does not happen again. We need a higher gas tax; that money should go toward the research and development of alternative, sustainable energy sources, and it should start right away. We've all contributed to this national addiction, and we all must work together to break away from it. Paying more for gasoline is the only way we will ever use less of it.

It will not be popular. Republicans will go crazy. Proposing a new tax, especially one that would affect every single American, will never be a great way to get votes. But we have to look past the political expediency of the present and focus on the long-term needs of our society. Right now, while the whole country is still reeling from the magnitude of this spill, this moment may be the only one in which the country would accept it as their obligation, as the right thing to do. Don't speak to us like we are children who need to be protected from this; we caused this and we have to be part of the solution. This is what divides us from the generation of Americans we called the greatest; we do not participate in the work, the struggle or the sacrifice unless we are asked to. Ask us. Ask of us to pay more, to use less, to make conscious, daily efforts towards reducing our use of oil. Make sure we see the pictures of those wetlands, hear the stories of all the fisherman facing financial ruin, witness all the destruction wrought by our own willingness to take what is easy and cheap over what is better for us.

Even more than a gas tax, we need a national campaign that reframes this, not as an environmental issue, but as a question of our values. Do we value our way of life? Our industries, our communities, our wildlife and natural beauty? The world we will be leaving to our children? Is cheap oil worth that much? This is a moment when the best parts of the American people need to be called upon, when we can be rallied to do our part to make up for the mistakes we've made and the damages we've caused.

Please, Mr. President, don't spare us any of the blame we have coming.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Day 139

Dear Mr. President,

Tonight you're having a state dinner for the President of Mexico. The First lady looks beautiful, the food sounds amazing, everything looks perfect. I'm at home, making dinner with my best friend, on one of those rainy nights that Seattle makes its reputation on. It's surreal to see the photos of the guests coming to dinner in dresses worth more than next year's tuition will cost me. I'm not dissing $10,000 gowns, or anything, but it is a clear reminder that there is an echelon of American society I'll never be a part of.

The media speculation that you're avoiding the press corps in order to dodge questions about Arlen Specter's primary defeat yesterday seems a bit hysterical, to me. I think that Specter was defeated by a better candidate, with a more solid history as a Democrat. It can be spun as part of an anti-incumbency trend, or as a failure of the White House's political mechanism, or as yet another sign that the world is going to end in 2012; I think, however, that when local or state-wide elections are described to be indicative of a national trend, voters rarely consider that when going to the polls. Pennsylvania democrats were probably voting for the candidate they thought would be best for Pennsylvania, not making a statement about national political trends. I think it was probably a mistake for the White House to endorse Specter, but I recognize that considerations of loyalty and strategy are probably more important than the media's perception that the President's endorsement isn't a magic bullett.

That being said, I think you should probably hold a press conference and let the press corps have at you. It's tedious and undignified and usually not much different from the talking points the White House is already using, but it does people good to see their President engaging with the media, and gives us the idea that you're willing to answer challenging questions. So many of us will never get an answer from you, directly, it's nice to see journalists asking for us, even if the right questions often elude them in their haste to obsess over process stories.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Day 138- On beauty

Dear Mr. President,

Our new Miss USA is sparking some unfortunate (if completely unsurprising) ignorance from the far right fringe. I generally (and equally unsurprisingly) don't like beauty pageants. I think they're absurd rituals focusing far too much on a person's physical characteristics and encouraging unrealistic images of the perfect female. I say this, of course, because I will never win any beauty pageants (not even for bloggers) and because that is out of my control, entirely. Also, because many of the most beautiful women I know have a difficult time being taken seriously as the intellectuals and professionals that they are. I think when we glorify the kind of superficial qualities that it takes to win a pageant we perpetuate the idea that those qualities are all that women who look that way have. Still, I find the grounds on which these right-wing bloggers (and the FOX senior beauty pageant analyst who takes them seriously) object to Miss Fakih offensive. To cite her race and her religion as the "PC" or "affirmative action" rationale for her winning is both stupid (even I can concede that, whatever else she may be, Miss Fakih is obviously an exceedingly beautiful woman,) and degrading. It implies that she is less "qualified" for this (exceedingly subjective) honor than her white, Christian, runners-up.

I don't know very much about Miss Fakih, aside from her being beautiful and from Michigan. She may be very bright, she may be rather stupid. I don't think her being Miss America tells us anything conclusive about her personal merit or intelligence. Gretchen Carlson, herself a former Miss America, certainly isn't a stupid woman, even if she does a convincing job playing one on TV. If I have to be represented by a pageant winner, I think that Rima Fakih is just as representative of me and the rest of America as any previous winners; that the history of Miss USA winners is growing more diverse reflects our own growing diversity, well. There will likely be many, many white, Christian winners in years to come, just as there will likely be Miss Americas representing other racial, religious and ethnic minorities. If people are really going to get upset every time the winner's background doesn't match up with their idea of what "American" looks or sounds or acts like, I suppose that's their prerogative.

For me, this debate recalls the sentiments of people who thought you weren't "American" enough to represent us as President. Be these the crazy people who think you were born in Kenya, the crazy people who think you're a Muslim usurper, or the crazy people who think you're against the flag and/or pledge of allegiance and/or Christianity, they all seem to imply that there's an American class of citizens who are more American than others, and that you (and Miss Fakih, and Elena Kagan,) don't belong in it. I'm all for free speech, so I absolutely believe they have a right to say all of this, and whatever other crazy, offensive stuff they can think of, but I don't think that organizations aiming to be taken seriously a news sources ought to cover it as anything other than what it is; racism, plain and simple. There's some strange contradiction in a kind of hatred based largely on physical appearances being directed at the winner of a competition based on the same thing, but I'm not sure it's enough to make either the people or the pageant consider changing their ways.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Monday, May 17, 2010

Day 137- Graham v. Florida

Dear Mr. President,

In an earlier letter, I spoke about the immorality of continuing to keep Omar Khadr in Guantanamo Bay for a crime he allegedly committed as a 15-year old boy. Today's Supreme Court decision, which rightly identifies the sentencing of minors to life without parole for crimes other than murder, again brought this case to my mind. But it also recalled another case, one which this week is fresh in my mind since you spoke at the memorial for fallen police officers. Maurice Clemmons, who murdered 4 police officers in Washington state, committed his first crime at 16. When governor Huckabee commuted his 108-year sentence to make him eligible for parole in 1999 (instead of 2015) he did so largely because of Clemmons's age at the time of his crimes. This case is a test of my convictions about juvenile sentencing. The visceral, personal, emotional reaction I have to the murder of police officers does not change the fact that, had I been Governor Huckabee, I would likely have made the same decision. I, too, would want to believe that the man had changed and grown and come to see the error of his ways. I, too, would have wanted to show mercy for mistakes made as a child.

What makes this case so frustrating is that, of course, Maurice Clemmons did not walk out of jail in 1999 and then live as an upstanding member of society until 2009; before murdering 4 officers he raped two children, assaulted two other officers, committed robbery, and was assessed by medical professionals to be highly dangerous and likely to re-offend. There were many points between the Governor commuting the sentence and the day those officers died when the system should have intervened to stop this terrible man. I do not think that giving him a second chance was a mistake, even if the series of additional chances following may have been. Can any one even say for certain that, at 16, Maurice Clemmons was already destined for this? I don't believe we can.

Still, his original sentences would have left him in an Arkansas prison until 2015; parole was not out of the question, even after a series of criminal acts. Those prisoners put away for life without parole who may eventually be released because of today's Supreme Court decision may have another Maurice Clemmons among them. We cannot pretend to know for certain what a person's future actions will be, but I think it is better to give a person a chance to change, so long as the safeguards built in to the system are implemented correctly.

The Supreme court acted in accordance with the spirit of the law, and the conscience of our country. I only hope that the wisdom behind their decision can be extrapolated to apply to Omar Khadr during his trial. I don't know if he will leave Guantanamo hating America even more, ready to return to the fight or to kill innocents. I don't know any of this, and neither do you and neither does any military tribunal. It is the fear we have to live with, if we are to adhere to our nation's moral code, to uphold the values of justice and fairness that we stand for. There is simply no number of prison cells that will ever make us safe.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Day 136- Za'atar

Dear Mr. President,

Tonight I baked bread topped with olive oil and za'atar. I bought the spices from a shop in Pike Place market, along with some dates. The old man who runs this shop was born in Jerusalem, and when I go there, we discuss the things I have seen and the things he remembers. We don't talk politics; the tragedy of me, a white American with no ancestral ties to that land, being allowed to move more freely through it than he who was born to a family that had lived there for generations would be too much for either of us to acknowledge. Instead, we stick to the small things; the smell of bread baking on the street corners by Damascus gate, the shapes of the rolls and the sesame seeds on the outside. The beauty of the sun on the dome of the rock, the superior quality of the olive oil or hummus or tomatoes. The conversation is short, and I, at least, leave his shop feeling closer to a land that I love as though it were my own.

The taste of tonight's meal, each round of flat bread sizzling in the oven with an egg on top, smothered in the fragrant blend of thyme and other spices that make za'atar so addicting, reminds me of the first time I ate this. It was our morning meal, the bread carried along in insulated bags to keep it warm, eaten about 2 miles in to our hike. We rested near a cave, marveling at the scenery and the heat; just beginning to emerge from the shyness that still made us strangers to one another. It is amazing to me, the way a scent and a flavor can bring back these small moments, make them so real I can almost feel same sun, hear the same voices.

Sometimes it is easy to explain why I feel the way I feel about Palestine. There are certain events, certain injustices, slogans that fit nicely onto tag-board signs, which make it easy to illustrate why my values require me to feel the way that I do. Sometimes, it is not about politics or values or anything more than the smell of za'atar and fresh olive oil bread, about enjoying the memories of some one else's home. One bite, and I am back at every kitchen-table mezze, being urged to eat more.

A military and a government like Israel's can do many things; it can take away rights, and lives, and livelihoods. It can take away freedom, restrict movement and education, it can keep out old men for fear of their ideas; it can reduce identity to the color of a card. It can demolish homes and shoot protesters and wall off every piece of land worth cultivating. It can change history and re-tell stories and pretend that a whole nation has never and will never exist. But it cannot harm the smell of bread baking, the taste of dates. It cannot change za'atar. Palestine is real, Mr. President, all five of my senses and my heart tell me so. It is time that maps and globes and laws reflected this truth, as well.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Day 135- Wait.

Dear Mr. President,

It's the end of a sunny Seattle day. High school students are celebrating Prom; tourists are coming out droves, and the cheerful good weather so uncharacteristic of our part of the world is getting eerily persistent. The last few letters that I've written you have been angry and bitter and sad. I don't say this by way of an apology; I feel that this week has had example after example of the kind of mystifying ignorance, ill will and horrifying abuses of power that stir such emotions in me. There are moments when I feel overwhelmed by all of this, and escaping it through distraction, a narrow focus on my own life and the incredibly small sphere of influence I have, seems the only sane course of action. But we take the good with the bad, much like the tourists and the sunny weather that brings them. They may be annoying and slow moving and indifferent to those of us with the audacity to try and live our lives in their vacation destination, but they stimulate our economy, they keep our city thriving and enable companies to employ us. And so we roll our eyes at the city's "be nicer to tourists" ad campaign, and we try to share the city and keep our sanity. (Your motorcade likely protects you from the worst of this in Washington, but I realize that city has it even worse than Seattle.)

You recently spoke at the fallen officers memorial, to the families of those police officers killed in the line of duty. (Of the 126 officers killed in 2009, 7 came from Washington state. 6 of those 7 were shot.) One of the officers I chat with every day at work is attending the ceremony. This is how I think of police officers; they're my parents and my neighbors and my regular customers; they're heroes who risk their lives to serve their communities. But with the good, comes incidents like this recent example of brutality by a Seattle PD officer. I've witnessed this kind of thing in my own neighborhood; one of our first nights in this apartment, we called 911 in the middle of a night for a woman who had collapsed in the street. The responding officers did not call medical services, instead they roughly searched the woman and degraded her verbally, before releasing her, barely able to stand, to a man who angrily berated her for leaving the car he'd left her in. I believe that officers like this, who, by their hostility, increase tensions between the community and law enforcement, and, by doing so, put other cops in danger. And there will be no end to them. All we can do then, is to hope that things will get better. That people will respect one another, and trust one another, and that, together, we will move forward.

Which is to say, Mr. President, in a convoluted way, that, like the perfectly innocent and the very grave, everything is a mix of good and bad that is made bearable only through respect and hope. That we can all do better, we can all work harder. I may write you angry letters, some days, but I still have tremendous respect for you as a person, for the enormity of the decisions you have to make, and for the office that you hold. Alexandre Dumas said that "all human wisdom is contained in these two words--"Wait and Hope." Neither of these are easy things to do. I just want you to know that I'm trying.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Friday, May 14, 2010

Day 134- One of us





Dear Mr. President,

John McCain really changed my mind about things, once I saw his new ad. If we build a wall along our entire border, we'll never have problems with drug trafficking or home invasions ever again. Build the wall, higher, stronger, and more formidable than any wall ever seen on this planet, and it will keep out all of those miscreants who risk their lives to sneak across our borders just to cause mischief. I was going to oppose the wall, me being a bleeding heart who thinks that all human life, regardless of geographic location, is equal, but John McCain set me straight.

My one concern with the wall is that it doesn't really stop the people in boats. I mean, people in boats sneak into this country all the time, so maybe we could wall off the coastlines, too? It might hurt tourism, but think of all the environmental benefits if humans were no longer allowed on any American beaches! And then there's Canada. Did I ever tell you how I crossed into the US from Canada illegally? It was on the Pacific Crest Trail, and I was 15. Let me tell you, it was way too easy. We should probably build a wall through there, too. It might hurt a few trees, upset a few migratory animals, but in the long run, it's what we have to do to keep the terrorists out.

One last concern; airplanes. I know, closing the airports to international flights seems like an easy fix, but what about parachutes? I don't want Mexicans HALO dropping into this country at night; they might make it past all of those lame desert states in the south and start taking our jobs here in the north. I'd imagine the Star Wars missile defense technology could help us here, but I'm not sure it's fully operational yet, so maybe we could make due with some giant trampolines? Or those spikes we put on window ledges to keep off the birds? My roommates want me to point out that electrifying the fence is an important step, but if Jurassic Park teaches us anything, it should be that we need a much more effective back-up system in the event of any power failures.

Once we've been effectively locked down, we'll have to go after the illegals already among us. (Especially once our import/export abilities are cut off by the coastal wall.) Maybe we could set up roadside stations, check every one's papers before we let them through? It might get kind of overwhelming for local law enforcement to do this alone, so we should probably staff these checkpoints with soldiers. (Actually, checkpoints is kind of an ugly, contentious word with all sorts of bad connotations, so let's call them "Citizenship defense stations.")

Anyway, what do you think? Are these the kind of comprehensive immigration solutions that will keep us safe from the dangerous onslaught of non-English-speaking killers flooding across into Arizona? Do you think that John McCain will let us be part of his club, now?

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Day 133- Bring them home

As a personal preface to tonight's letter, I'd like to emphasize that I do not intend this letter to stand as a sweeping indictment of anything other than war itself. I do not think that all soldier are war criminals, and I do not think that all those who commit the kinds of horrible acts I'm writing about are necessarily responsible for their own actions. I know I have a number of readers who are serving or who have served in the armed forces; I have tremendous respect for them, and for all our troops, which is why I don't believe they should be sent into situations like Iraq and Afghanistan. It's also why I do believe that those who put all of them at risk by violating the rules of war and of common decency should be held accountable, be they soldiers, commanding officers, or the civilian leaders of the military at the DOD or in the White House.

Dear Mr. President,

As a student at Boise State University, I was lucky enough to take classes from a gifted professor who had a friendship with Seymour Hersh. Mr. Hersh gave a lecture at our school that year, and, the morning before, spoke with the thirty or so students in my class directly. Our discussion was mainly about the recent revelations, brought to light by Mr. Hersh himself, about the prisoner abuses at Abu Ghraib. I recall thinking, at the time, that Mr. Hersh's legacy of bringing the most intimate horrors of war to the public's eye was a testament to his tenacity as a reporter, but not to any increase in the brutality of America's wars. Mr. Hersh, who would have still gone down in history a journalistic icon if he'd retired after breaking the story of the Mai Lai massacre, continues to bring us the sad news of our own war crimes, this time on your watch. Battlefield executions (or, for that matter, prisoner abuse and the killing of civilians,) are probably nothing new in the history of the American military; one only need read Vonnegut's account of World War II to see that, even when fought for noble and just causes, war cannot be waged without these kinds of brutalities.

How does your Christianity allow such conduct? How does your humanity? The evidence mounts, daily, that the wars we fight in Iraq and Afghanistan, (wars which, I grant, you did not start,) are bloody, costly, and doing far more harm than good for all involved. There must be a clear sense, in the field, by the troops, that their commanding officers right up to their commander in chief will not allow, condone, or, most importantly, ignore, the violations of human rights and international law that continue to be uncovered. This expectation must be clear, public, and enforced even at the levels of high command. I respect the men and women who serve our country in uniform, sir, if anything I count them among the victims of these wars, but when even one of them kills a prisoner in cold blood, they do so in my name, with my country's flag on their arms, and I am just as responsible for it as they are. And, even more to the point, Mr. President, so are you.

A distinction Mr. Hersh made to our class about the awareness, higher up the chain of command, as to what was going on at Abu Ghraib, was echoed years later by another professor, this time at the University of Washington. Discussing international law, both emphasized that the standard for culpability is when those in power knew, or should have known human rights abuses were occurring. As much as I love international law, this is one instance in which my first concern is not the legality of your behavior but the morality of it. I don't know, and will likely never know, if you condone or even order these battlefield executions, but I doubt very much that you do. I do know that you are the leader of this military and I elected you, in part, with the hope that you would curtail the human rights abuses by US soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan by the only means that I know for sure will accomplish this; by bringing them home.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Day 132- The myth of mainstream

Dear Mr. President,

In today's Washington Post, Kathleen Parker contends that, due to her education and New York City origins, "Elena Kagan is miles away from mainstream America." While her argument, which is based on some pretty impressively weak logic, is artfully refuted by Ed Kilgore at fivethirtyeight, I'd like to discuss why it is acceptable for Ms. Parker to so casually assert the claim that some of us are somehow more American than others. Imagine, for a moment, if she based this claim not on geography, but on race, gender, age, or religion; would the Washington Post still put its name above that? I am so tired of the conservative contention that there is a "real" America and a "liberal" America, and that living in or coming from a certain type of place makes a person more or less representative of quintessential America.

I grew up in a small town, with farms and small businesses and enough Christian republicans with barely a GED in their ancestry to satisfy even Ms. Parker's definition of a "real" American town. I don't think the people I grew up with can be described as any one thing, (other than, maybe, as Arlingtonians,) and certainly not as qualified (or unqualified) for the Supreme Court. Now, however, I live in a city full of vegetarian atheist lesbians who have PHDs and disdain Wal-mart; again, nothing except our geographic location is true for all of us, and, no matter what Ms. Parker (or Ms. Palin) may think, living in a city didn't change the seal on my passport, or my devotion to this country.

This stirs such an emotional response from me because I had a stepmother who constantly told me that my "book smarts" were inferior to the "street smarts" she and her family possessed. That I, as a young teenager, could be more intelligent than her, but I would never have more common sense. I have not finished college, largely because I have had to work a full-time job for the entirety of it, but, were I to go back to my stepmother's house, I would still be classified, in her mind, as numbering among the out-of-touch, academic, elite. Like Kagan, I am somehow less authentically American. I am so angry that my intelligence, which may not be anything better than slightly above average but is still my greatest strength, makes me lesser, in the eyes of this woman and those who think like her. I got a 5 on the AP calculus and English tests; I got a 1490 SATs and I was a National Merit Scholar. I've also flipped burgers, cut pizzas, waited tables, ran cash registers, and, god knows, made lattes. I've lived in rural and urban areas, in suburban cookie-cutter houses, and in tiny, turn-of-the-century apartment buildings. None of this says much about the type of person that I am, or my qualification as an "ordinary" American. I'm an American, so is Elena Kagan, and if my experience is an American experience, so is hers.

The nine men and women who wield the ultimate power of the Judicial branch with lifetime appointments should not be "ordinary." These should be the brightest, most engaged and creative and, yes, educated, individuals we can find. An understanding of how the law affects ordinary Americans (a classification that I think you intended to indicate Americans without direct power in any of the three branches of government, and not their hometown,) does not mean that one has to be average. I can't say much about what I do or do not want a Supreme Court Justice to be; they can come from any state, any religion, any race, any social class. The one thing I know for sure is that I don't want average minds on the Supreme Court. This is not to say that one must be an Ivy league scholar, either, only that I think the strengths and advantages that make a person extraordinary ought to be valued, not disdained.

It is long past time to end the social acceptability of such disdain for education and intelligence, the belief that one's patriotism or empathy is tied, somehow, to what part of the country they come from. Elena Kagan must be evaluated on her merit's as a potential Justice, not on her place of birth.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Day 131

Dear Mr. President,

I applied to go back to school today. After running out of viable alternatives to complete my degree (night school, bank robbery, insurance fraud, etc.) I've finally concluded that I have to face my fear and go back full-time. What is unusual about this situation is that, instead of fearing the unknown, I know exactly what I'm afraid of. I'm afraid of the stress, the inevitable choice between being a good employee and being a good student, (or, put another way, of having the means to support myself or the kind of grades I expect,) of the endless bureaucracy of attending a large school, my own deteriorating academic skills and my failure to measure up to classes growing younger as I age. I've been through it, before, and I do not look forward to doing it again, for an entire year. I've put it off for so long, because of the calculated risks, feeling as though I know, already, that I will fail, and so it is not worth trying. But business as usual isn't acceptable; my life is not what I want it to be, my career, my contribution to my community, nothing about my station in life is acceptable and so I have to put aside my habits and self-doubt and even my pride, and I have to do what is difficult.

Lately I feel like your administration has faced a similar struggle. It's as though you can't seem to break out of the same patterns that force you to perpetuate a status quo you know to be unacceptable. Why, for example, is the White House rallying for incumbent Democrats who don't support your legislative agenda? Why do we continue to prop up Hamid Karzai in Afghanistan, or accept defeat when it comes to new energy policy? Our problems are similar, Mr. President, in that we both have the power and will to improve, but somehow find ourselves bogged down in the day-to-day. I understand; it's difficult to get aggressive on your legislative agenda when it's flooding in Tennessee and oil is spilling into the Gulf; when bombs, (or, at least, fair attempts at bombs) are being left in Times Square and Arizona seems ready to replace its law enforcement with a modern-era manifestation of the Glanton gang. But time is slipping away from both of us, and, before you know it, the midterms will be over and it will be time to run again. Your approval rating may be creeping up, but you know that the years will be long gone before you're able to accomplish what you set out to if you wait for the political will to come to you.

Neither of us can afford to waste our time in mediocrity, in half-hearted attempts born of fear. I hope that your administration musters all of its courage and finds new approaches to solving the problems of our day; that you take the difficult paths and fight for your beliefs, without compromising before you even reach the negotiation. You ought to re-evaluate the promises you made to the electorate during your campaign and the progress made so far toward those ends. I worry that four years will pass before you look around and realize you haven't fought hard enough, for fear of failure, or that you've been bogged down with day-by-day crisis management and never got to take on enough of the big picture. A constant reflection on the goals of your administration is essential to the necessary sense of urgency your office requires. Like me, you still have so many people who believe in you, and I know you, too, want that faith to be rewarded.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Monday, May 10, 2010

Day 130- Out in public

Tonight's letter is in reference to a post on a former coworker's excellent blog Cultural Minefield. While he and I agree on very little, politically, he is the kind of intellectual I can't help but love to disagree with, especially when I know he can out-argue me on just about anything. He is a brilliant and reasonable individual and I miss him dearly. His post was a comment on Elena Kagan's rumored sexual orientation, and cites this article, for those looking to read more.

Dear Mr. President,

Today you announced Elena Kagan as your nominee for the Supreme Court. I am hardly qualified to comment on the virtues of this; while I relish the idea of the gender balance of the court tipping ever so slightly toward a more realistic reflection of the country, I don't value the symbolism of a female justice above the practical questions about her legal philosophies. I think that your familiarity with her and her views are enough for me, for now, to hope for the best. I've heard murmurs in the media, especially on blogs, about Kagan's sexual orientation. That your administration has refused to comment on this is expected and correct; it is certainly Kagan's prerogative to out herself if she chooses. I cannot imagine accepting a position that would require such scrutiny while simultaneously attempting to keep hidden something like sexual orientation, which the press will pursue perhaps even more doggedly than an affair scandal.

One commentator compared her sexual orientation to her religion, saying that while neither were should exclude her from nomination, it was significant that her religion could be openly discussed while her sexuality could not. I don't agree. For one thing, a person's political, moral and social views are influenced by religion, and religious persecution in this country is far less socially acceptable than the homophobia that is law in many states. There is no amendment to any state's constitution banning Jewish marriage. Some questioned the existence of a "secret" spouse who would be, hypothetically, hidden from the public. I find this highly amusing, given that those conservatives speculating about her secret marriage would have public records to confirm their suspicions, were they less successful at preventing lesbians in this country from openly marrying.

I understand why Kagan would want to hide her hypothetical homosexuality; it is perfectly reasonable to fear the reaction of our country's bigoted populace, not to mention the insulting questions and doubt cast on her objectivity sure to arise during her confirmation hearings in the Senate. I don't know that I could endure it, myself. However, if she is a lesbian, I hope she does speak openly about it, and that the White House does not discourage her from doing so. It is long past time that gay and lesbian Americans enjoyed the same rights of any of us, and, while appointing an openly gay Supreme Court Justice might be more symbolic than tangibly beneficial to the gay community, the most valuable consequence might be for the American government to demonstrate it isn't completely out of touch with American values. That, whatever small-minded individuals who might see it as disqualifying may say, the White House and the Senate are determined to confirm the most qualified individual, and believe, as do much of the American public, that a person's sexual orientation is neither a source of shame or basis for criticism. An expression of hope for a day when such facts about a person will actually arose no more interest or controversy from the media than their religion.

I look forward to the confirmation hearing, in the, (dim, I admit) hope that this one will focus more on the nominee's qualifications and legal philosophy than on any absurd "wise Latina" minutiae; should this fantasy not come to pass, I hope that Kagan is prepared for the difficult and undignified road ahead. I wish her luck.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Day 129- Mom (part 2)

Dear Mr. President,

I wrote you yesterday about my mother's strengths and the many things she has taught me. Perhaps the most important lessons she has passed down are the ones she never intended to; the lessons I learned, not from her strength, but her shortcomings. My mother is not a saint. She is quick to anger, often hijacked by her emotions and was unable to prepare me for the same feelings that would take over, without warning, the despair and the rage and the inexplicable rapidity and intensity with which they would strike. She often became angry or emotional without warning or obvious provocation, and, as I find myself disposed to the same behavior, I have nothing from her to look to for how to manage it.

Growing up, she never sought to control us, something I'm sure was considered a weakness in a parent, though I think it granted her children somewhat more in the way of independence, if we occasionally lack in discipline and direction. This taught me to take responsibility for my actions; to do what I believe to be right, to question rules and limitations arbitrarily imposed upon me by others. While I might at times have wished for the ease and simplicity of being given the solutions, my mother seemed to believe it was more important for me to find my own answers, than to ensure that I arrived at the right one.

My mother's failings have taught me that it is acceptable to be human. To make mistakes. To succumb to emotion. To fail, apologize, and try again. She has allowed me to know and to understand her as a person, not just as a faultless maternal symbol. This acceptance of weakness and fault in another person is essential to develop compassion, empathy and self-awareness. I see this lacking so often in our society, be it in our feigned shock at the human shortcomings of our leaders, or in our lack of compassion for those who have made bad choices, regardless of the desperation of the circumstances. I suppose expecting a lot from other people is good, we do, at times, surprise ourselves by living up to the best of what other people expect of us; but demands for perfect must, inevitably, be only requests for deception or disappointment, two things most of us will encounter far too often, anyway.

And so, in that spirit, I write you today in order to praise my mother's faults, her errors and her eccentricities; her failures and her bad judgment. As my first, and most significant teacher, she has, though these errors, given me the ability to accept them in others, and in myself. In this time of such deep uncertainty, it is reassuring to know that I can still count on people, even when I find their perfection lacking.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Day 128- Mom (part 1)

Today and tomorrow's letters are going to be connected, both because I think my mom is so awesome that I want to write two letters about her, and I'd like to spend tomorrow with her, not working. Today's letter will be completed before midnight and tomorrow's will be written just after, so I apologize for the short space between posts, and the relatively "fluffy" letters. I'll be back to real politics on Monday.

Also, check out the Mother's day event Michelle Obama hosted this week at the White House, if you're interested.

Dear Mr. President,

My mother is an amazing woman. She's raised three girls, worked her whole life to help others, for years serving our community as a police officer, specializing in helping children and victims of sexual assault. She certainly deserves more than just a day of celebration. I know you understand the important role that mothers play; I enjoyed your writing about your own mother in Dreams from my father, and your obvious respect for the First Lady shows how much you continue to appreciate the difficult job of raising children. My own mother has taught me countless things; she's prepared me for life as an adult by emphasizing self-sufficiency, education, and accountability. I think she would have liked to pass on more of her predilection for cleanliness and organization, but at least I got her eyes, her political leanings, and her sense of humor.

Tomorrow my sisters, brothers-in-law, and I are taking our mother to a baseball game. We don't get together as often as we should, even though we live relatively near one another. We all work, different hours and different days, we all commute, and my youngest sister has a young son to take care of as well. These excuses make it easy for us to go weeks, even months, without getting together. When I lived in DC, my mother would send me little cards every month or so; some had newspaper articles she thought I'd like to read, others were signed from all of the family cats. It made me feel close to her, despite the times zones that separated us. Now that we work in the same city, it's sad how little time we actually spend together.

My mother reads everything she can about you and your family, and especially admires your wife a great deal. I think she'd like it if I told you a bit about her. She's as remarkable as any woman; her story is unique and incredibly commonplace. She grew up in Michigan, the middle of 5 children, and wanted to become a teacher. She's great with children and animals, she's compassionate, brave, and sarcastic. Also, she can't watch the news without arguing with or yelling at the TV. I don't know her nearly as well as I'd like. She's made me the person I am today; I'm grateful to her for all of the wisdom and courage she's instilled in her children.

Mr. President, you've often spoken out for the importance of equal pay for women; you've worked to improve our education, health care and other social services, and you've appointed female role models like Hillary Clinton and Sonya Sotomayor. Thank you, for your commitment to our mothers, and the mothers of generations to come.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Friday, May 7, 2010

Day 127- Omar Khadr

Dear Mr. President,

I don't know Omar Khadr. I don't know his crimes, his history or the circumstances surrounding his arrest and detention. I don't have any opinion about his guilt or innocence. I know one thing, only one thing for sure, about Omar Khadr; on the day of his arrest by US soldiers 8 years ago, he was 15 years old. I don't need to know anything else, Mr. President. I don't need to know who he allegedly killed or how he confessed to the crime of participating in the losing side of an ugly war. I don't need to know these things because it is simply inexcusable for us to treat a child this way. A child who was wounded and nearly dead when we arrested him and tortured him and convinced him that he would suffer even worse if he did not confess.

I've been 15. We've all been 15. And I'm not claiming that going to war or throwing grenades is just some adolescent stage that Khadr would have outgrown, but, by now, he has certainly lost his best chance at growing up into something better. There are legal and political arguments to be made about the rules of war and what is acceptable conduct, but we're talking about a child, who was surrounded by political upheaval, facing an invading army (right or wrong, it is what we are,) with better weapons and better armor and better training, and who, allegedly, threw a grenade; there is a higher moral argument to be made against calling that a "war crime." He should have spent the last eight years in school, not in prison. While his actions have consequences that must be acknowledged, this country has a moral obligation to demonstrate, to the world, the way a responsible superpower conducts itself. I don't believe for a second that you need to be told this, sir, but a responsible superpower does not behave this way toward children. There is simply no crime this boy could have committed to warrant the treatment he has received at American hands. This is why people hate us. It makes us less safe, it generates more anti-American sentiment, and it's just wrong.

You promised to close Guantanamo Bay, and that has not happened. We have had no explanation for this failure, no apology for the broken promise, and no indication that it will be fulfilled in the future. The people who voted for you are entitled to these answers, Mr. President, and if you cannot give them, you can at least ensure that Omar Khadr's treatment and trial are fair, just, and conducted with due consideration of his age at the time of his arrest. It is a small mercy that should be given, not out of symbolism or political expediency, but because, in this instance, we have behaved appallingly, and there will be no rectifying it until we say so.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Day 126- Timothy McVeigh died an American

Dear Mr. President,

Joe Lieberman's bill aiming to revoke the citizenship of anyone who associates with foreign terror groups who attack the the US or its allies makes me more fearful of my government than I have ever been before. To begin with, Senator Lieberman has made it clear that his bill targets those joining Islamic groups above all others; Timothy McVeigh, were he alive today, would have nothing to fear from this bill. Neither would the Hutaree militia. Why should plotting to overthrow our government be more of a crime, or some one suspected of it be eligible for less legal protection, if it involves foreign terrorist organizations and not domestic ones? This bill doesn't even require proof that the citizen is planning an act of violence; affiliation is grounds enough to revoke a person's citizenship.

Our citizenship is not based upon our behavior. Child molesters, rapists, serial killers, Neo-Nazis, Klansmen, even Dick Cheney all get to keep their status as citizens, regardless of the scale of their crimes against this country or their intent to commit more. The true test of the rights and legal protections we have as citizens is when they must be applied even to the worst among us. The bill Mr. Lieberman is proposing would do more to harm the fabric and character of our national values than any act of violence ever could.

Moral arguments aside, I fail to see the legal or political advantages to this bill. For starters, isn't prosecuting non-citizens who commit crimes against the United States infinitely more complicated than prosecuting our own citizens? Any trials and convictions are far more likely to withstand legal challenge if the utmost precaution was taken to avoid infringing upon the legal rights of the defendant. Having those legal rights clearly defined helps prevent them from being violated. Yes, it's easier to break down the door of a murder suspect and start looking for evidence than to wait and obtain a search warrant. But if the evidence is thrown out in court or on appeal, a killer goes free. We're all made safer when the rights and protections guaranteed to us by the constitution are respected for every one.

Perhaps this legislation upsets me so much because I see how, with only the smallest stretches, it could be applied to me. I've traveled to Palestine, and I've sent money, both to charitable organizations and educational institutions. The way Palestinian groups are viewed by my government is often quite extreme; you yourself had to circumvent some of the more draconian anti-Palestinian legislation in the service of our own national security interests. I have little doubt that Senator Lieberman and my own definition of appropriate groups to affiliate myself with may be different, in this part of the world. In addition, I have written, both in letters to you and in other places, about doubting the morality of remaining in America while my tax dollars pay for the Israeli occupation. Would this be grounds enough to demonstrate intent to renounce my citizenship? I'm not a lawyer, Mr. President, but it seems to me that this bill might easily be applied to mean that, without a shred of violent intent towards any American, I could be viewed as unworthy of my rights as an American citizen.

Please, sir, do not support this legislation. Walk back the support of those in your administration, like Secretary Clinton, who would, in their zeal to fight terror, do more harm to this country than any they bomb ever could. We cannot turn on our own citizens; the greatest threats to civil liberties have historically come in the name of protection from enemies inside and out. Remember, Mr. President, your power, and Senator Lieberman's power, comes from the citizens of this country who granted it to you. We trusted you to defend and uphold those codified rights that are older than any of us and will outlast us all. No amount of fear will ever make it acceptable for those rights to be taken away.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Day 125- Why I'm still drinking the koolaid

Dear Mr. President,

Cults make me uncomfortable. I choke on the corporatespeak they feed us at work. I can't stomach the suspension of disbelief required for organized religion. I'm a skeptical person by nature and I can't shut off the part of me that constantly questions what I am told. I do not often fit in with ideologies, isms or cults of personality. And yet, I drink the Hope Koolaid better than almost any one I know.

It's not that I think you're always right; it's not that I think you always make the best choices or even act with the best of intentions. You're really my last hope, these days. I can't give up, believe the system to be hopelessly corrupt and refuse to participate; that would hand my power as a citizen over to some one else. I can't, honestly, envision a viable third party candidate, especially one who is more representative of my beliefs than you are. I have to believe in your wisdom and in your goodness, because if you're not the person best able to steer our nation right now, I'm at a loss for who the alternative would be.

This is not to say that my support for you is out of a lack of other options. Maybe it's just as irrational and just as naive as any other kind of faith, but it is more than blind loyalty. I do have issues with your policies and some of your beliefs, but I think, even among the Democrats, you're the person I respect the most because of the way you approach problems. I have a tremendous amount of faith in the people of this country; in my generation and the force of demographics to, slowly, move us closer to a fairer, freer and more just nation; I also know I can't change anything acting by myself. I believe that the change you promised us will come, probably long after you've left office, but we have to keep working toward it, more slowly than any one will find acceptable.

I am subject to the system, as are you. The difference, I think, is that I have the capacity to shift it very little, while you seem to have accepted too much of the status quo as inevitable, without consideration of your own, considerably greater, power to change it. You don't have to accept things as they've always been; be it the wars you inherited, the legacy of American imperialism, our backwards and bigoted social policies or the same old blue dog incumbents in the Democratic party. Your campaign empowered so many of the disenfranchised of this nation; it isn't hubris to reject the trappings of the system that disenfranchised them in the first place. The 17 months of your presidency have seen no shortage of missed opportunities to bring about the kind of change you asked us all to hope for; but I'm raising a glass, and keeping the faith, for the two and half years you've got left.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Day 124

Dear Mr. President,

Some days, I'll admit, I really don't know what to say. I read the press briefings, I read the White House blog, I read the news. Sometimes I'm upset or encouraged by things and I want to tell you. Sometimes I think I actually can offer a unique perspective. Most of the time, I remember that you're surrounded by advisers who know better than me, (and probably even a few who know better than you,) and you don't need another voice chiming in to tell you what you already know. These days, when I have nothing policy-related to contribute, I just want to give you a better idea of what it's like to be me, your constituent and supporter and fellow American.

Today was a challenging day. For the last few days I've been feeling angry and exhausted and anxious, and today I realized it's because I'm scared. I'm scared of looking the mirror and reconciling myself to who I have become. I'm scared that the life I lead now might be all I'm ever going to do; that the 8 years of my life spent in near-minimum wage jobs, working for hours on my feet has brought me nowhere closer to the life I thought I'd have by this age. I'm scared that if I do what I have to do to finish my degree that it will be too hard, or I'll have gotten too stupid, or I'll be just as lost and tired and poor on the other side of graduation. This fear chases me every day, and today, for no reason at all, it has become overwhelming.

There are so many harder things in life than fear of disappointed hopes. Today while riding the ferry I met a Filipino woman who wanted me to know that she was 73 years old. She was so adamant about this that she pulled out her driver's license to show me. She's lived in America for 53 years and she told me that, even though she's a senior citizen and doesn't have to pay for the bus, she still pays every time because she's "rich." After we got off of the ferry (an ordeal in itself when you're 73, 5' tall, and trying to carry an umbrella and a full, boiling hot, cup-o-noodle,) she spent most of our bus ride shaking her umbrella at the bus driver and scolding him for driving too slow or stopping too long at stoplights. I think she might be a little crazy, but after living 73 years, moving to a new country and learning a new language, having 4 children and 8 grandchildren and still taking day trips on public transit by herself to see the sights of the islands, I also think she's earned a bit of madness. (The driver seemed to agree, and bore her abuse with good humor.) What strikes me, as I reflect on our conversation, is the intense self-satisfaction she seemed to exude. She told me she's going to die soon, but that it's OK because she's been alive long enough. I wonder what enough will look like, for me. Will I ever reach a point where I feel like I've done and said and lived enough? Will I ever take stock of my accomplishments with the same pride?

When people ask me if I think you've read any of my letters personally, I always point out that you read 10/night, and even if I'm only 1 in 40,000 letters every day, I still have hope. Sometimes I have specific questions I'd like answered, specific complaints I'd like addressed, and sometimes I don't worry about getting a response at all. Tonight is one of those times where I don't imagine there's a form letter your office can send in response to this, (unless, of course, you have "keep your chin up, tiger" form letters, in which case I think I really will have collected them all.) There's no legislative agenda to address my concerns, no shift in public policy that would make me sleep easy tonight. I'm just scared; scared about the smallness of my life and the darkness of the unknown before me. I don't think that you can be plagued by this kind of self-doubt, but having the tangible evidence of your own significance that comes with raising a family, writing bestsellers, and holding high office must be its own kind of burden. I suppose if you can do those things, if the woman on the ferry today can live the kind of life she has, I can put aside this unproductive fear and find my own way to contribute something more.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Monday, May 3, 2010

Day 123-Predators

Dear Mr. President,

I enjoyed watching your jokes at the correspondent's dinner. While I think that Jay Leno was a poor choice, I respect that other people may have different tastes than mine. I assumed that, with a major environment crisis in the Gulf, a foiled car bomb in New York, an election imminent in the UK, several contentious state primaries, and the legislation aimed at the torment of pregnant women passed recently in Oklahoma, people would have more important things to talk about than the jokes you told at dinner. But I was wrong. (This is sort of your fault. If you hadn't encouraged me to embrace the spirit of civility by reading the Drudge Report, I'd never have found out about this.)

Anyway, it seems that some people feel that your Jonas Brothers/Predator drone joke wasn't really a laughing matter, considering the number of people even less threatening than the Jonas Brothers who are actually killed by these weapons every year. I'm a big fan of the "politically correct" and even I don't get this. Back in high school my dad used to joke about his gun collection/police buddies/access to criminal background checks to any boy who wanted to date me. It's lame dad humor. Every dad jokes about that, right? No one believes you're actually using the Predator drone as your own personal play-toy, right? I think the wars we're waging abroad are awful, morally baseless and catastrophically unfair, but I think getting upset over people actually getting killed is a far more useful way to spend one's emotional energy than to get upset over a joke that (no offense) was certainly not an original one.

Speaking of fatherly humor, I read some remarks by the First Lady about your daughter Malia's concern for saving the tiger population. I thought you should know that you're getting outpaced by Russia and Iran on this issue, or at least missing out on the heads of state big cat exchange. I'm sure Malia would agree with me that getting a Persian Leopard would be pretty freaking cool, so maybe you and Ahmadinejad could work through your differences and get Bo a new playmate? I'm sure the question "Dad, why can't you be more like Vladimir Putin?" is not one you want to hear over dinner.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Day 122- Katrina

Dear Mr. President,

The media stories comparing your response to the oil spill in the Gulf to the Bush administration's response to Katrina are starting to get to me. For one thing, I still find the mistreatment and neglect of American citizens by our own government in the face of an environmental disaster to be offensive; belittling the magnitude of this failure by constantly comparing it to other disasters makes a poor substitute for actual journalism. This crisis is distinct in many ways and the administration's response to it needs to be whatever is most suited to the unique demands of this situation, and not based on some artificial scale set by the previous administrations failures.

If there is any lesson to be had from the Bush administration, and especially their handling of Katrina, it ought to be that the President should be able to admit to mistakes. President Bush could have turned his failures into something more useful, had he been able to own up to being wrong. Instead, caught up in a desperate attempt to sell his administration as being right all the time, confusing decisiveness with gravitas, attempting to doublespeak his way through contradiction and hypocrisy when confronted with it, he alienated people and made each mistake seem even worse through his obvious insensitivity to it. This isn't the type of President that you've proven yourself to be.

The oil spill in the gulf should cause us to seriously re-evaluate a number of aspects of domestic policy. I think the decision to halt any new offshore drilling projects was a good one; I hope that it lasts longer than the media storm. I'm also hoping that the projections for the size and scope of the spill are wrong; if it is smaller and easier to fix than we fear, that will be a blessing to all of the lives and livelihoods threatened, and if that makes it more difficult to make the case against drilling for more oil, that's certainly a price I'm willing, and even eager, to pay. But I hope that the hysterical, worst-case scenarios being discussed right now are taken seriously, even if we are fortunate enough that they do not come to pass; they should serve as a wake-up call to this country about the hidden cost of cheap oil and the dangers of our current lifestyles.

I think that so far your response to this crisis has been appropriate given the information available. More importantly, you've long since proven that you're an engaged and capable leader who is willing to work through the challenges facing this country even when it is not politically expedient. I hope that you can also admit when your best intentions fail, when you make the wrong decisions, or when there simply wasn't enough information to act appropriately. It brings people together and reminds us all that being willing to adapt and learn from mistakes is more important than blindly and desperately insisting you've been right all along.

Respectfully yours,

Kelsey